Before Ben was born I was excited about becoming a dad, yet it felt different because after all, I had never held him or had any interaction with him. Although I could hear the beat of his little heart or feel his little kicks, the feeling of loving someone whom I had never met was quite unusual. Granted that not knowing the gender before he was born perhaps added to the feeling of detachment. With that being said, I was very much caught off-guard when I heard him cry for the first time. The feeling of falling tremendously in love instantly was a whole new experience.
There are several things that I am proud of that I rarely bring up to anyone. I am proud of owning the first car I ever rode in, the fact that my jeep is 20 years old and still running strong, owning the complete first edition die cast cars from the movie cars, or my small collection of Tonka trucks. It's exciting to know that my in-laws show interest in my enthusiasm for cars and jeeps or at the least are excited when I visit them. It brings peace of mind that my family enjoys spending time with Traci and that she loves spending time with them.
Switching topics. In order to get the engine out of the Plymouth we needed an engine hoist. Since we didn't own one, Traci looked online, found one and told me to go pick it up. Later that week while I mentioned it to my friend I said, "I don't know how many husbands can say that they bought an engine hoist for their wife." His reply was quite unforgettable. "I'm pretty sure that if I bought one for my wife, she would hang me from it."
In conclusion, men live a miserable life except for me. Actually, it's hard to express the excitement and joy of seeing my son breathe his first breath of air, hear his first cry or see his first smile. Ben surpasses anything I'm proud of by a long shot. He's brought an unimaginable happiness to my life that I could have never perceive. It's like the joy of placing down that last piece of a puzzle. It's that moment when you go out for lunch and come back to a better parking spot. It's when you hit that point in a book where you suddenly can't stop reading. It's that great feeling of having a big turnout at your surprise birthday party. It's driving down an old road with large trees that touch and form a canopy over everything. It's that sensation of placing your feet in a lake on a hot summer day. It's the experience of feeling the warm sun rays' on a cold winter day. It's knowing that I can buy an engine hoist for my wife. It's finding out that reality is better than dreaming.
Consider me the luckiest man alive.
